She is free.

I received the phone call from the hospital in the early hours of the morning. Nan had passed away.

She is now free. Free from pain. Free from being force fed. Free from having to live because some people were not willing to accept the fact she was ready to go.

I was told she was unconscious for about the last 12 hours. This is comforting for me to know as i believe it made the transition into her next life a calmer one for her.

I have always been one who likes to know information, who likes details.
I would love to know the exact time she passed. I would love to know what her final day was like. I would love to find out what her final medical results were. I would love to know exactly where the cancer had spread.
I doubt i will ever get this exact information. It is something i will have to live with for the rest of my life.

But one thing is for sure.

I know i was ALWAYS honest with everyone.

I know i ALWAYS gave Nan my full attention and care when i was looking after her; not just in these most recent weeks & months but for all my life.
I have helped her with lots of things since i was a little girl and i can live my life knowing i always did the most i could for Nan and i know she appreciated everything i did for her.

 

I love you so much Nan.
May you now fly free.

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